Locked Down in London, Day 4: Stay at Home, Leper!
The health service sent me an even longer text today which requires me to put myself into solitary confinement for a minimum of 12 weeks. You couldn’t do this to an inmate in a prison; it would be illegal. If I was HM the Queen of England, I could perhaps comply with their instructions but unfortunately…
Sleep separately if you can. Stay 3 steps away from others at home. Keep away from children … Eat separately, using your own cutlery, dishcloths and towels. Clean and wipe down surfaces in the kitchen, bathroom and door handles before use. If you can, use separate bathrooms. If you share a bathroom, use it first and clean it between uses…
Thank you, I was not aware that I was a leper.
Within the hour, the patronising text from the NHS was followed by a bullyish one from the UK government:
New rules in force now: stay at home… Stay at home. Protect the NHS. Save lives.
What happened to English politeness? I mean not a single please.
Finally, the Transport of London chimed in with more of the same:
Non-essential journeys risk lives. Stay at home!
This latter came decorated with a nice big red exclamation mark, just in case I’m particularly slow-witted.